I’ve been grappling with this concept for quite some time until I had a completely honest conversation with Jesus.
It’s no surprise that I love fashion.
My camera roll is filled with outfit inspirations from my favorite designers, models, and bloggers. And my Pinterest? it has all of my fashion needs broken up into many different categories.
I love trying on clothes and finding new ways to style old pieces and I get excited when an outfit comes together.
I love styling and I love fashion photography as I currently serve as both model and photographer for LuxeStreetChic.
I take my pictures on the street so, naturally, people are curious as to what a girl all dressed up with a camera and tripod in hand is up to.
It draws attention which is expected but sometimes, it draws in the wrong crowd.
Men are always honking at me, catcalling and approaching me while I take my pictures.
Men would even park near me, sit in their car to watch me take pictures. This happens almost every time I do a photoshoot and I’m always by myself (I always pray that the Lord sends His angels to watch over me and protect me. I’m also mindful of where I choose to shoot).
Does it make me feel uncomfortable? Absolutely. But I always wrote it off as thirsty men being thirsty.
It wasn’t until my Grey Deys photoshoot where I began to question if my style of clothing represented Christ.
Durring that particular photoshoot, There was a car parked across the street with two men inside and they sat there just watching me.
One of them got out of his car, walked up to me and said “damn you got some nice titties.”
I immediately felt dirty.
I packed up all my equipment, went home and cried.
When I got in the shower, I didn’t even want to look at, let alone touch my body to clean it.
I had felt so violated and I began to blame myself.
I told myself that if I wasn’t showing cleavage, that guy would’ve never said that to me. Even though there were times when I would be completely covered up and still be harassed by men.
I started to hate my pictures.
The pictures that I worked so hard to produce, I hated them.
I’ve developed a relationship with Christ to the point where I hear Him all the time and get convicted of certain things.
Up until that day, I had never felt even an ounce of conviction in regards to my clothes.
When that incident happened, I was overwhelmed with guilt and shame… two emotions that have absolutely nothing to do with God.
Before I brought my cares to the Lord, I brought them to my mom (who is a very conservative) and her sentiments echoed the shame and guilt I had already been feeling.
I decided to delete pictures from my blog/Instagram that I thought were maybe pushing the envelope too far.
For example, I had a few medium shots (pictures framed from the neck to waist) which were meant to show outfit detailing but unintentionally drew focus to my breasts. Though my intentions were pure, I realized that others might have perceived it differently.
A couple of weeks later, my mom called me and said that the Lord wanted her to me that “I’m not representing Him by the way that I dress and that I don’t need to dress this way for attention or to speed up my career because the Lord will do that for me”.
After I hung up the phone, I let God have it.
I was screaming and crying asking God what He wanted from me?! Why others are telling me what I need to feel convicted about? Why He speaks to me in every area of my life except for fashion? Why did He put the desire for fashion in my heart? Did He put the desire for fashion in my heart?
I questioned every single thing the Lord ever told me including my purpose and the promises He has for me.
I was angry because I thought God knew my heart so, how in world could He tell someone else that I was dressing for a certain type of attention with motives and intentions that have never, ever crossed my mind.
I don’t dress for men.
I thought my entire relationship with God was a lie.
I started to think that I never actually knew God and that He didn’t love me enough to correct me.
I felt so lost.
I’m not blaming my mother for anything. She is a God fearing woman who loves me and only wants the best for me. The problem was, I sometimes valued her opinion more than God’s word.
I reached out to an old high school friend and she reminded me that people only confirm what God has already told you and I have the power to either accept or reject whatever word is given to me… no matter how close I am to that person.
Sometimes, people lead with the phrase “God told me…” then tell you what they think.
A lot of Christians base the words they give off of what they see.
If it looks good to them, then you’re a good Christian. Doesn’t matter what kind of fruit you bear as long as you look “Christian-y”
So, for the ones who pretend to be a good Christian but live their lives as if they don’t know Christ, I wonder if people say “God told me…” eventhough they look perfect on the outside.
But, back to the orginal question: Can Christians be Sexy?
Well, what is your definition of sexy?
What are your intentions? (you can’t hide your heart from God)
Do you have a relationship with Him? Is He leading/ guiding you?
Remember, Christianity is about your relationship with Christ and not about rules, religion or tradition.
Please don’t confuse that with “Well, I have a realationship with God so I can do whatever I want.”
A true relationship with God is when you’re both insync and His ways are your ways.
There are Christians in the world who are so foucsed on the religous aspect of Christianity that they miss God.
So, my advice to you is to pray for wisdom and follow your convictions.